People are paying more for groceries, gas and other necessities, and many families are rethinking their holiday gift giving this year. Now is a good time for families to start discussing this issue with each other.

People need to decide how much they can afford to spend and be sure they stick to that budget. Many families now have only one family member working, and some are working with budgets much reduced from this time a year ago. Sometimes the “January surprise” of a hefty credit card bill after the holidays is more stress than today’s families can handle.

Financial planning experts often suggest that people spend no more than 1.5 percent of their annual income on holiday gifts, decorating and entertaining. But with the economy the way it is there is nothing wrong with spending less.

Parents need to get away from the guilt of what they spend or don’t spend. With our actions we as parents are teaching our kids about the meaning of holidays.

One suggestion from the extension family is to look back at your own childhood memories. You probably don’t remember how many gifts you got, but maybe one special gift. More likely, we sometimes find, it was what you did during the holidays and the traditions your family had.

We try to take the grandchildren on a Santa Train Ride. There are several in the surrounding areas and they are not very expensive. It is a way to get the cousins all together. If not a train ride, why not a craft day with the children. Scrapbooking, sewing or wood crafting small items would not be very expensive and the time spent with the children would generate memories never forgotten. It seems time is something we need to spend more and more with our youth and children.

Parents and older children might set a budget for the holidays. Why not hold a family meeting to help refocus the holiday on relationships rather than gifts. Parents and children could talk not only about how much money the family will spend but also how the family will spend its time during the holidays.

Why not start some new traditions, such as helping a charity or preparing special foods. Several of Tonja’s children are on gluten-free diets, and Tonja as well. I would never imagined how serious allergic reactions to wheat can be for some people. Tonja can now cook all kinds of desserts and other foods using gluten free products. Since her children cannot have gluten, we are going to have a gluten-free baking day during Christmas involving all the grandchildren. For the past 20 years we work at our church to feed a Christmas meal to shut-ins or anyone who wants one. Our children know that on Christmas morning, Gran and Popaw will be at church.

For families that are really struggling, a budget needs to be made before hand and really keep spending in line.

Children 6 and under are not going to know what things cost or count the number of gifts they receive, so whatever a family can afford will be enough.

From ages 7 or 8 and older, children may be a little disappointed if they get less than last year, but they can understand the basic concept of a change in the family’s financial situation.

Parents should feel more comfortable being open about the need to change what we do for the holidays, including gifts and spending. In fact, teens may have their own ideas about gifts and be willing to share in the cost of a more expensive gift.

Parents can look at this as an opportunity to refocus holiday time on relationships. Time spent with our kids is really more important than spending money. For more information on Christmas budgeting, contact the Harlan County Extension Service at 573-4464.

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